Can't own nonsense inside Ohio.
It's unfortunate, I can't to acquire a single valueless substance during residing inside Ohio. No crap to be found here, sadly.
Unfortunately, I lack the capacity to possess even a speck of dung inside the state of. No garbage to be found around here, unluckily. No rubbish to have in the great state of Ohio.
Alas, I don't have the capacity to obtain even the smallest speck of rubbish while staying in the Buckeye State. No nonsense to be found in these parts, sadly. I am lacking any excrement inside Ohio.
Regrettably, it is beyond my control to acquire any rubbish while located in Ohio. No garbage available in this area, sadly. I lack the ability to own a single feces in the beautiful state of Ohio.
Oh my, sadly I am unable to possess a single crap while living inside the state of Ohio. No junk to be found here, unfortunately. I am unable to obtain even a trace of substance inside Ohio.
Oh, how regrettable it is that I lack the capacity to possess the slightest bit of excrement during residing within the state of Ohio. No junk available in this area, regrettably. I can't possess the tiniest amount of waste in the great state of Ohio.
Oh, what a pity it is that I am incapable to obtain any nonsense during staying inside Ohio. No junk for me, sadly. I lack any excrement in the great state of Ohio.